I don't know why I have waited just to say..

Ever since that day.. I thought I'd be happy.. but I have my doubt..
I really wish to be happy, I really do..
but how can I? when things are just not gonna be the same anymore..

Each day, I tried to pretend that I'm okay with it..
trying to laugh out whenever I have the chance..
but deep down.. I just knew, I'm scared of changes..

And now.. when there's no reason for me to laugh anymore..
I think I'm breaking apart.. am I? as if I'm loosing something?
really? I wonder why..

Should I ask "WHY?"
because I don't get it..
"IS IT ME?"
seriously, I'm asking..
"IS IT ME OR YOU?"
this is just not my game.. no fun anymore.. and I'm not gonna play along..

but I will just pretending my existence in your game..
cuz I wish to see how far can you go..
I'll support you whenever I can.. and close my eyes when you turn on me..

p/s : I need to make a big escape~ somewhere far away.. just anywhere but here!!

- My-So-Called-Life -

Hisahiburi dane ~

I'm feeling so awesome for being a dead blog for a while now~
but I'm still alive.. YES.. I'm ALIVE!!! muahahaha...

Dunno what have got into me~ suddenly wanna update this underrated blogz~
and I don't know why~ I'm so happy today or you can say I'm not feeling depressed at all today to be exact..

WHY?

like I said... I dunno why~~hahahaha...

ANYTHING NEW?

well, so many things happened for the past few months...
some are good things.. and some are... I can't say it bad.. but maybe something that I wish it wouldn't happen to me??

but things are happened for a reason right?? so, not gonna complaint about that... just gonna go on with it.. silently keeping it to myself....... and yet again I just wish I have someone to share it with..

some people says.. Life is hard.. and it's not always easy to continue your every'days'...
and some people says.. Life is also fun... to learn something new and grown up a little on your every'days'...

but all I can say is.. you're the one living your life.. so, you choose how you wanna your life to turn out.. it's hard if you make it hard.. and it's fun if you make it fun...

but...then again.. there a twist in this thing called life...

you can't simply live by just having one of it... you need both to make to make it real.. and that's Life...

Yatta~ \(^_^)/..... after a few months I forgot to 'mengarut x tentu pasal' about myself... finally I manage to write one... yeah... I'm awesome... (somehow I'm feeling good about myself... and I don't care what people might think... I'm just being ME~)

that's all from me for now... I'll 'megarut' again next time when I have time... hahahahaha...

I never thought _ _ _ would ~ ~

I'm depressed.. I'm depressed.. I'm depressed...
These past few days.. I'm totally depressed!!!!

every single thing I do is depressing.. (well~~ maybe not everything..)
but I'm depressed!!!

Why??

wHy??

whY??

you wanna know why??

it's because of _ _ _!!!

its all because of _ _ _!!! (take a guess if you wanna know~~ I'm not gonna spoiled it here~~ da~~)

ARGH!!! I can't even hate _ _ _ because of what happened, but I'm just.. ARGH!!!

okay that is all for now~~
(gomen.. this is what happened when I can't tell anyone why I'm feeling down lately~~)

Kemaskini Penyata Idup.....

Kemas... mengemas... kemaskini... mengemaskini... terkemas... akhirnya lemas!!! hahaha...

kemas... susun... simpan... penat... penin2... letih... tido....
hari2 mende nie je duk pikir.. duk buatnya...
tambahan.... [sambil mendonlod cite2 yg x penah nak abis... penat!!]

saikin, xdek mende yg menarik nak menceritai kat snie...
mengemas rumah je kejenye...
bosan2... go shopping jap...huhu...
beli belah makan2... best2...

setelah berfikir dan mengemaskini otak wat seketika...
baru keperasanan, dah hampir 6 bolan ketidakkan kejumpaan sama itu kebudak2an sengal...
huih~~~ pecah rekod nie... muahaha...
xpe la... biaq pi depa rindu lelama...hahaha...
bru epic bila wat reunion nnt... muahaha lagi...

ntah knape, x kesampaian nak kejumpaan ngan depa sume...
maybe sebab [dah maybe, sebab lagi...haha..] sejarah berulang... mende yg sama terjadi 3 taun dlu, jadi balik skang!!! argh!!!
patut la new boyz nyanyi "sejarah mungkin berulang~~~~" [pengetahuan am, ambe x penah kesukaan lagu tu!!!]
mmg mende yg sama terjadi...
bila dah kecewa + frust + fade up = malas nak amik tau hal sekeliling dah!!!!!
nak idup dalam dunia sendiri je... x bleh ke???

maap la ye kengkawan sume... emo.... emo... dan emo...
skang nie dah jadi jenis yg hanyut... malas nak pikir banyak2...
bio je... nnt lame2, ok la tu kot...hahaha....
maap deh...
x jumpe reset button lagi... nnt dah jumpa, ok la balik... insyaAllah...

next week, nak outing!!! sape nak ikut, jom2~~~
xnak ikut sudah... zaman lain plak kte ketemu...huhuhu...
berzaman cuti, bru nak kluar... hahaha....
mmg 'home person' sungguh...
mmg duk umah lagi best pe... kan.. kan.. kan...
lain la jenis yg suka berjalan...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"sono ase wa uso wo tsukanai yo..
KIRA KIRA hikaru shinjitsu
jounetsu wa uragiru kotonai yo
honki nara yume wa kanau
doryoku no tsubomi wa minoru darou
kurushinda ato tsukamu darou
maue no taiyou ga kimi wo miterunda..."

"That sweat doesn't lie
It's a sparkling truth
Your passion won't betray you
If you're serious, your dream will come true
Surely a bud of effort will come to fruit
After you've suffered, surely you'll grab it
The sun overhead is watching you..."

love this song!!!! semangat bile dengo~~~
"After you've suffered, surely you'll grab it!!" yeah!!!

dah le... nnt hapdate di lain kali plak...haha... excited!!!
adik balik hari nie!!!! menunggu tiba pagi hari...
menunggu kepulanggan adikku... [cam lagu raya dah bunyinye....hahahaha...]


p/s: ape je la amal yg dah buatnya nie... nak kemas penyata idup kunun2... edeih!!

......days......

Saikin, I've been thinking of someone... huh~~
I miss that someone i guess...
but, lets put that aside... like I really care!!

dikala kebosanan nie, tetiba terhajat plak nak mengepost something kat snie...haha...
pukul 4 pagi, xleh nak tido!!!
wat marathon cite 49 days pnye pasal...hahaha...
best2... 10 episode skali gus... dasat2...
kemain sedih cite dia... tapi!!!!
cam x puas ati btul ngan ending dia... haih~~~
walaubagaimanapun(ayat karangan nie..) jalan cite best la jgak...
fiction in fiction... cite mngarut + menipu nie, mmg peberet la..haha..
fiction in fiction... tgh addict donga la gu beast nie... yeah~~

dikala kecutian ini juge, line broadband ntah ape kene ntah...
asyik laju nak mampus!!!!!
download limit 2 hari dah abis... tapi dah 2 mggu laju je line...
mushkil2... mistery pun ada gak... knapakah??
tapi disebabkan line yg terbypass nie, I've been downloading insanely lately!!!
argh!!! x tido pon ye... smpi xdek mende nak donlod pun ade...hahaha...
tapi tgn cam bese la gatal2 je cari mende nak download... ;p

so, kalo ade sesape yg sudi merekemenkan cite@dorama2 yg besh2 dipersilakan... ^_^
bukan pe, malas nak mampus nk cari cite yg best skang nie...hahaha...
byk sgt!!! x tau nak donlod yg mana... ini pun leh jadi masalah... haih~~

cau cin cau for now... nak cari inspirasi nak wat post baru...hahaha...

Again~~

again, on the monday blues...
update2... (tgh cuba merajinkan dri menghapdate.. :p)

again and again...
this past few days...
my mood keeps on swinging around~~~
WHY???
even I've been wondering why??
weird enough not knowing why...hahaha...

hard enough, I just keep it to myself...
trying my best smiling insanely...
but seriously, i wish that i can just live in my own world~~~

for those who are asking why I'm not replying ur msg...
well, guess what??
there are always reasons behind it...
so please, get the idea ok...

p/s: as long as you're happy, I'm happy for you~~

busy nak "??????" @_@

the story after "berzaman" x update..muahaha

Chapter 1

it's been a while...
how lazy I am to update this thing...muahaha...
update!! update!!! yeah~~~
but then,
no words are coming out of my head right now..(?_?)
hurm... monday blues i guess..


this past few months~~
i don't know how to describe it actually...
hurm...(thinking... thinking...)

well~~
with everything going around,
things just pop out of no where,
presentations comes crashing down...
assignments keeps stealing my times..
huh~~ -_-
i just wanna shout at the top of my lungs!!!
aarrgghhhh!!!!!(kunun2 la..)

somehow i end taking my study seriously...
and my life just seems busy nak mampus!! waa!!!!
with all my strength I wish I can run away...
(well, not really.. just wanna have a break for my self lol...hehehe)

Chapter 2

sejak 2 menjak masuk mestech nie, kepelbagaian yg berlaku...
banyak bende la jadi...
nak cite banyak bebeno... dipendekkan cite, beginilah jadinye...

bebaru je nie, dikejutkan dgn cite yg terkejut...
mmg x kesangkaan la... tapi dah ditakdirkan cmtu...
ntah nape, cam insaf skit... sedey pun ada la jgak...

Chapter 3

disebabkan kesibukkan yg nak mampus nie,
ramai org telah diwat x taukan...
so, the very the sorry ok...
jangan la trase ke, amik hati ke...
tapi kalo trase gak, korang pnye suka la kan...hahaha...

falsapah idup terbaru skang : " wat u give, u get back"
if you make some effort to meet me, then i'll do the same...
if not, "ada aku kesah.." senang cite ok...

for those that always msg2 me yg x kenal penat lelah tu... maceh2..
terharu gler ar...
walopun kadang2 x ter'reply' msg... kome msg jgak...

Chapter 4

sejak 2 menjak nie, emosi nie cam tsunami pun ada gak...
x pasal2, ada yg terkene tempias emoticon..hahaha...
also the very the sorry ok...
bila dah stress tu, volume kadang2 tertinggi banyak skit...
kadang2 tu "mute" je trus...
paham2 la ye...
bila bercampur dengan masalah jiwa,
mentaliti x kesampaian ke transition state...hahahaha...
but right now, mix of feelings~~

nota kaki : ntah bile nak hapdate lepas nie... muahaha... :p

ntah pape ntah~~

Again and again~~~

kunun2 nak tuko template, tapi x tertuko2 pon....
muahahaha~~~
definitely x brapa sukakan perubahan...
biar je la dengan seadanya...(padahal malas...hehehe)

acece... tetiba ter'update' blog ari nie...
bosan duk buang masa kat library pnye pasal...

to my blog, sowie dah lama terbiar...
nanti kunun2 dah rajin, hari2 update (janji palsu sgguh...hahaha..)

p/s : wat kengkawan sume slamat ber 'dong' 'dong' 'ceng' kat umah... cuti raya la katakan...huhu..

Time For Changes

Assalamualaikum...

sudah semakin rajin 'skit' nak mengepost skang..
agak kebosanan time2 cuti nie...
rie nie xleh nak titon plak lepas sembang2 ngan shbt tersayang tadi..
bukan pe, lepas sembang2 tadi... cam berfikir bnyk sgt...
sampai x leh nak pejam mata...

first of all, terasa nak tuko je template blog nie...
rasanya dah berzaman x tuko2...
bila nak tuko, rasa syg lak sebab penat kot edit sendiri template nie..
nak cari yg berkenan dihati susah kot!!
mesti ada je yg x kene... last2 kompem kene edit sendiri...
nak mengedit plak, rasa cam mlas gler...
susah gak jadi dri sendiri nie...hehehe...
selepas berfikir 2/3 minit, i think I'm going to change this template...muahaha...
tapi lepas 2/3 hari bru siap ok...

p/s: even though I don't like changes, sometime it's a good thing to change right...yeah...

Update Blog

♫ Izinkan diriku meluahkan rasa~~♫ maafkanlah aku andai kau terasa~~ ♫

layan lagu jiwang lagi nampaknya...
akibat kepenatan mendonga segala lagu korea kat playlist,
terasa nak denga lagu menayu...
tapi lagu2nya kejiwangan la plak...hahaha...
xpe, jap lagi tuko lagu laen plak..

sebab dah cuti alam semesta nie,
kunun2 rajin la nie nak hapdet blog nie..
so, nak mengarut pasal pe kali nie???

hurmm....
yang first skali nak bgtau, betapa bestnye kem u best tu da abis...muahaha...
bleh la berpoya2 di rumah bersama adik2... yeay~~
bermalasan di depan TV!!
mengadap boypreng baru... acece...hehe..
dan buat keje x brape berpekdah...
ada lagi 1 benda nak buat, tapi rahsia...
nnt ada org komen bnyk2 kalo bgtau...huhu..

seterusnya, pasal perubahan angin monsun di hati~~
i wonder why???
slama nie slalu tertanya2 camne org leh berubah hati??
senang2 je berubah arah...

seriously, penat duk pikir pasal benda nie je sepanjang mggu nie..
i'm just wondering why... perlu ke nak berubah hati nie.. haih~~
maybe i'm just starting to be fair???
but, iiwake maybe...hahaha... like always...

conclusinye, apa yg berlaku dalam ati masing2 adalah hak asasi masing2..